Slender
by RedAlert98
Summary: Wally and Dick's reaction as they play Slender...includes Roy, the pizza man, cops, and of course, Slenderman. Rated T for swearing, Funny, No slash
"Turn the lights off," Dick ordered Wally, who immediately complied. "And the TV," he added, giving Roy a pointed look.

"TV stays on," Roy stated as he propped his feet up on the coffee table.

"You're ruining the mood, Roy!" Dick whined, and Wally joined in with, "Ya Roy, you're ruining the mood!"

"I will mute the TV, and that is as far as my generosity in this matter goes," he told them, ignoring their pouting expressions.

"Okay, starting," Dick announced from the kitchen table, which was visible from the living room. "So, we gotta collect all 8 pages. Piece of cake."

A moment later an insistent crunching sound had Roy blinking hard, willing himself to be patient. "Listen, I am NOT going to listen to you guys eat potato chips for the next hour or whatever while you get your horror movie hi-jinx on, so put them away."

"We're not eating chips, it's the guy walking," Wally said to Roy, sounding like he was talking to a toddler.

"Don't patronize me, Kid," Roy warned. Sighing, he decided to close his eyes, lean his head back on the couch, and just listen and see how this 'Slender' played out.

"Is that a page?

"Ya. A stick person surrounded by a bunch of headless stick persons."

"Its a stick person surrounded by trees, Wally."

Loud thumping sounds suddenly emitted from the computer's speakers.

"Is bigfoot after us or something?"

"Ya, or something. Keep walking."

...

"Okay are you doing the cricket noise, or is it the game?"

"It's the game, Wally, the game."

...

"Do we really have to go into the bathrooms?"

"Thats just a bad idea, look how dark it is in there."

"You scared, Grayson?"

"Fine, go ahead and die before you even have the second page; see if I care."

"I'm goin in. Hey, see? Another note. 'Don't look...or it takes you.' Well that's cheerful."

"It's thumping again! Dude, get out of the bathrooms!"

...

"Shouldn't we have seen him by nowSH!T he's right there go go go!

"Why is this person breathing hard he isn't even running?! Did we lose him? I think we lost him. By the way Wally, I get a turn on the controls soon."

...

"This kinda reminds me of when Harry has to go into the Forbidden forest in the first book. Except he had Hagrid, and all I have is...you."

"Shut up Grayson."

...

"Look, wall of wood - probably a note there."

"Ya, and Slenderman."

"Point the flashlight up more CRAP what was that huge Boom?! Is he here?!"

"Just move, GO!"

...

"Go left. No, the other left."

"Hey look, a tunnel."

"I've seen enough horror movies to know how THIS turns out. Wait you're really going inside the tunnel?"

"Ha! found a note. Slenderman with 'no no no no no no no no' written all over it. Classy."

"It's getting louder, he's getting closer, GET OUT OF THERE,"

"Dude you're paranoid...whoa SH!T WHAT'S THIS GUY'S PROBLEM?!"

"MOVE YOUR ASS WALLY HE'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU!"

...

"So how's it going, guys?" Roy asked, thoroughly amused. Dick was muttering foreign words under his breath, staring at the screen in intense concentration. Wally was chewing his bottom lip, cringing.

"How about a pizza?" he asked, and received no reply. Leaving them at the kitchen table, he went into his bedroom to order 5 pizzas. Once finished, he went out to the living room again, to continue recording their reaction. These two idiots were priceless.

...

"Stop! Go back! A note right there, 'Always watches, no eyes'. Well thats comforting."

"If I take it he's gonna find us."

"Just take the note."

"Move move run RUN YOU FOOL WHY CAN'T THIS LOSER RUN?!"

"Why can't we punch this guy?! Hang on I wanna see what he looks like,"

"Wally are you INSANE?!"

"I'm turning to look, crap we're fritzing SH!T HE'S RIGHT THERE! I'm gonna look again,"

"WALLY YOU IDIOT STOP TURNING TO LOOK AT HIM, LET ME DO IT YOU'RE GONNA GET US KILLED,"

...

"hey hey HEY we're fritzing again! Climb a tree, dig a hole, jump the fence, do something! DUDE LIKE NOW"

"I'm TRYING! I hate this guy! Ah that was way too close!"

"Nonono not again NO! Come on don't you have something in your utility belt?!"  
"It's a game Wally, there is no utility belt!"

"Oh rightHOLY SH!T we're deeeeeead,"

...

Roy estimated the pizza to be there in about seven minutes, so went to the bedroom to get a few things ready. Pulling out a tux, a black tie, some dress shoes, and an old, white stretchy pillow case, he tossed the items into a backpack, then left the apartment, completely unnoticed by Dick and Wally. His phone was safely, steadily, and discreetly recording from it's propped up position on the side table near the couch.

...

"This guy is such a creep! He's as bad as some of my stalkers!"

"You still have stalkers?"

"Well not at the immediate moment, but several in the past. That one kidnapping, remember? That guy was a stalker, and a total perv. He like, sniffed my hair, cut off a lock of it to do a ritual or some psychotic bs like that. I escaped before things went any further though, and he's in jail. Hey, there's a page."

"Well your hair does smell nice, DUDE GET AWAY GO, man you suck lemme do it HE'S RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!"

"SH!T! Hands off Wally! LA DRACU!"

"no NO NO!"

"DON'T PUNCH THE COMPUTER WALLY!"

...

Roy had the suit and shoes on, the pillow case ready, and was just waiting for the pizza guy to get to his floor. Shouldn't be much longer...

The elevator dinged, the doors opened, and the scent of fresh pizza slowly wafted it's way down the hall.

"Hey, Jimbo!" Roy greeted the delivery boy; Jim was a year younger than Roy and always did the deliveries to his building.

"Hey, What's up with the suit, man? And...the pillow case?" Jim watched, bewildered as Roy put the white pillow case over his head, tied it tight in the back, and tucked the knot into the back of his collar.

"Okay, help me get right in front of my apartment door, then hand me the pizzas, and knock okay? Then move out of the way a good fifteen feet. Feel free to stick around to watch, or even record on video," Roy told Jim, who just shook his head in amusement and slight confusion.

...

"That game is..is...STUPID," Wally said, gesturing wildly as he paced in the kitchen, "and we're NEVER playing it again."

Dick was resting his head in his arms on the kitchen table, and turned to look at the door; someone had knocked four times.

"Didn't Roy mention something about pizza?" Wally asked, heading towards the door. "Where is he, anyway? Come on, you're paying."

Dick grabbed his water bottle from the table and followed Wally to the door.

"Dude,"

...

Jim had knocked and backed away, leaving Roy, dressed as Slenderman, standing in front of the door with the pizzas. Roy stood a little straighter, then didn't move a muscle as he heard them talking behind the door.

"Dude, WHY do I always have to pay?!" Dick was complaining. "Roy's rich too, make him pay!"

"Why do I always have to pay?" Wally mocked in a high pitched voice, and the doorknob started turning.

...

The door opened, and a scream of 'the F*CK!" erupted from Wally's mouth; Dick whipped his head up from looking in his wallet, and he proceeded to launch his water bottle at Roy while yelling something unintelligible. Wally slammed the door, eyes wide and breathing labored as he used the wall for support. Dick facepalmed and tried to take a long, even breath before storming out the door.

Roy had dropped the pizzas and was on the floor, his sides heaving and eyes watering from the most intense laughter he'd ever experienced...Jim was bent over double from laughter as well, but fought his way over to Roy to help get the pillowcase off his head before he suffocated.

Just as they'd got the pillow case off, both still in fits of hysteria, Dick stormed out the door and started yelling at Roy in at least two different languages, and only got louder as they laughed harder at him. Eventually a call to the police was made from one of the neighbors for 'disturbance of the peace' and 'possible domestic abuse', so Roy and Jim had to try and explain to the cops through tears of mirth what happened, while Dick hid in the apartment to avoid being recognized. Wally was lying on the floor in shock, which they were able to bring him out of by waving pizza in front of his face. Only one of the dropped pizzas suffered severe casualties, Jim got a 50 dollar tip from Roy, Dick pickpocketed Wally to pay for the pizza, and they didn't even get in trouble from the cops, who left laughing, with several slices of pizza each for their trouble.

So basically?

Game over.

* * *

I couldn't figure out how to end this! Ya sorry if it sucks. The ending, I mean. Or maybe the whole story. I pictured it turning out differently.

SHoutout to CHBNewRomeHogwartsBerk ! Feel free to explode my inbox anytime, I don't mind XD Glad you're having fun reading my stories, I can't help but cringe at some of the earlier ones, haha. Booyah, awesome reader!

This is my 39th story! Whoo!


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